Vol 11, #303 19 December 1999

The Mauritius Hash Trash

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year !


Great to see so many new and old faces at our Christmas Hash.

Many thanks to all those who brought along the food, cakes, watermelon etc, etc. Thank you to everyone who helps keep this Hash going throughout the year.

As so many Hashers will be away over the New Year period, we are not running a Hash on 02 January, so see you all on the 16th!

Best wishes from your Hash MishManagement, for a great Christmas and New Year!!!!



First Hash

Welcome to all the First Timers - Caroline from The Netherlands; Gunter & Helmut from Germany; Peter a regular visitor to Mauritius who has now found the Hash; Cecile Brehain (Mireille & Etienne's daughter); Shelley's Mum from England; and Nicki from Mauritius!

Second Hash

Rashmee 'Betty Boo' made it back.

Religious Adv/Sex Councillor

The barber's quartet of Alan, Bob, Richard and Anand were the back-up for our RA's little story about Jimmy's brother Patrick.

Our RA doesn't often award Down Downs but he just had to give one to Curly Tops for wearing the same shorts to the Hash for at least the last three years!

Car on a bit of wood Award to Perry Joseph.

Happy Hashers Award Supreme Cupid gave this to Curly Tops - are the batteries flat?

Children's Award From Stephan to Susie.

Fashion Award First timer Peter with the flowery hat.

Smelly Blue T Shirt

From Jackie Russell to her best friend, Mirielle 'Bonnie' Brehain. Lends a whole new meaning to 'what are best friends for'.

Gay Singles

Keith is 'off Island' not lost - bring it next time.

Special Down Down

To the quiet achiever, Stand-in Edit Hare - Alan 'St. Bruno' Oliphant.

A Committee Down Down to Dave 'Hash Cash' Colbert and our Hares - Santa and Cupid.


Thank you for all that great food Mandy and Shelley

Also a big thank you to Val Lane and Tusia Perry for the Christmas Cakes.

Next Hash

#304 The first Hash of 2000, note the date - NO Hash on 02 January

1000 hrs, 16 January 2000

Hares : Tusia Joseph

Directions: Do not have the directions yet - will send them out in the New Year.

Hash #304 - 16 January - Tusia Joseph

Hash #305 - 30 January - Dagmar & Detlev

Food Line

Hash #304, 16 January - Jean-Francois


Tíwas the night before Christmas - Old Santa was pissed

He cussed out the elves and threw down his list
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks
I have a good mind to scrap the whole works

Iíve busted my ass for damn near a year
Instead of "Thanks Santa" - what do I hear
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night
The elves want more money - The reindeer all fight

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS
And just when I thought that things would get better
Those ass holes from IRS sent me a letter

They say I owe taxes - if that ainít damn funny
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus money?
And the kids these days - they all are the pits
They want the impossible... Those mean little shits

I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds
Assembling dolls... Their arms, legs and heads
I made a ton of yo yoís - No request for them
They want computers and robots... they think Iím IBM!

If you think thatís bad...just picture this
Try holding those brats... with their pants full of piss
They pull on my nose - they grab at my beard
And if I donít smile.. their moms think Iím weird

Flying through the air...dodging the trees
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees
Iím quitting this job...thereís just no enjoyment
Iíll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment

Thereís no Christmas this year...now you know the reason - I found me a blonde..

Iím going SOUTH for the season!!

Iíll laze in the sun-into bed Iíll get tucked
And those snotty nosed brats-can go and get ****ed.



Supreme Beings: Latimer (6963815) & Kevin Murray (7210576)

Trailmaster: Lord Russell

Cellarmaster: Julie & John

Hash Horn: Yves "BoogieWoogie" Robert

Fashion Advisor: Sylvia

Religious Advisor/Sex Councillor: Leslie Nimno

Barbecue Bearer: David ĎShortieí Colbert

Ice Maiden: Dagmar Neubacher

Ha$h Ca$h: David ĎShortieí Colbert

Drinks for Wimps and Kids: Julie & John

Bangers and Hash: Reverse Alphabet

Hash Market: Bob Tumblety

Web Meister: Alan Oliphant

Website: http:// : http://www.mhash.com

Edit-Hare: Wendy Austin (6257399)