HASH TRASH Vol 11, #305, 13 February 2000

First Timers

Welcome to the big group from Hyundai; Wayne David from Mauritius; Judy from Canada visiting Linda; Scotsman Les; Oya from Turkey and Barclay. Look forward to seeing you all at the next one!

Second Times

Great to see Anita and Coral now known as the 'House Hunters' for obvious reasons, returned for their Down Downs. Well done even though most of it ended up on Anita's head.

Smelly Blue

Juliette was very lucky to escape a Down Down for having run the Hash with the Smelly Blue tied around her waist - remember, you are supposed to wear it! Edit Hare is still waiting for your Personality Profile Juliette. Seeing as how Anita was already covered in beer from her Down Down, Julitte figured she was as good a candidate as anyone for this Award. Congratulations Anita!

Rules of the Smelly Blue

* Never ever wash it!

* Embroider (that is sewing for the simple Hasher) your name on it along with decoration if you like

* Personality Profile to Edit Hare

Children's Award

Phil happily received this Award from Susie along with a kiss.

Religious Advisor/Sex Councillor

Introduced well known returning Hashers Patrice and Pratima. Patrice had a gift for Supremous Blobus of a didgereedoo - you will need to practice Supremous. Patrice and Pratima committed the sin of getting married whilst in Australia so were appropriately given a Down Down for that.

Then there was that Jimmy story ............

New Shoes

We were all very sad (not) to see First Timer Oya sporting new shoes! The dreaded Down Down in the Shoe followed.

Hash Business

A big thank you to Alexandra who saved the day by volunteering to do the food. All those of you who haven't done the food yet, please let Edit Hare know when you would like to do it. Remember we reimburse you for the cost up to Rs1500.

Next Hash

#306, 27 February 2000

Hare: Yves Robert

Directions: From the North, take the road towards Black River. Turn right at the traffic light on the sign of Albion before reaching Bambous Village. Go straight towards the beach. Turn left at the Hash sign.

From the West, pass Medine sugar estate, pass Bambous Village. Turn left at the traffic light on the sign of Albion. Go straight toward the beach. Turn left at the Hash sign.

Hash Line

#307, 12 March - Volunteer needed

#308, 26 March - Volunteer needed

Food Line

#306, 27 February - Jennifer Fleurot

#307, 12 March - Volunteer needed

#308, 26 March - Volunteer needed

MAD HASH 2000

Our organiser of overseas Hashes Sylvia has been very busy getting a quotation together for a great outing to Madagascar. Details follow, please note prices are per person.

Proposed Itinerary: Depart Mauritius Friday, 28 April returning Tuesday, 02 May. Cost:

Double, Single, child sharing parent's room

(a) bed & breakfast Rs 12,345; Rs 15,585; Rs 6,175
(b) half board Rs 14,215; Rs 17,455; Rs 7,840
(c) Full board Rs 16,080; Rs 19,320; Rs 9,525

The above costs include the following:

- air ticket Mauritius/Antananarivo/Mauritius
- Transfer airport/hotel/airport
- 4 nights at Hotel Plaza - Antananarivo
- visit to the Zoo & Handicraft Market } by car + driver + touring guide
- 1 excursion to Ambohimanga }

Interested Hashers should contact Sylvia on 4243639 (home) or 2081806 (work) for bookings as seats are limited and there is a lot of planning to be organised.

Hash Humour

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory, the other two I forget.

You're getting old when you don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

Middle age is when work is a lot less fun and fun a lot more work.

Statistics show that at the age of seventy, there are five women to every man. Isn't that the darnedest time for a guy to get those odds?

You know you're getting on in years when the women at the office start confiding in you.

Middle age is when it takes longer to rest than to get tired.

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.

Middle age is when you have stopped growing at both ends, and have begun to grow in the middle.

Of course I'm against sin; I'm against anything that I'm too old to enjoy.

A man has reached middle age when he is cautioned to slow down by his doctor instead of by the police.

Middle age is having a choice of two temptations and choosing the one that will get you home earlier.

You know you're into middle age when you realize that caution is the only thing you care to exercise.

At my age, "getting a little action" means I don't need to take a laxative.

Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.

The aging process could be slowed down if it had to work its way through Congress.

You're getting old when getting lucky means you find your car in the parking lot.

You're getting old when you're sitting in a rocker and you can't get it started.

You're getting old when your wife gives up sex for Lent, and you don't know till the 4th of July.

You're getting old when you wake up with that morning-after feeling, and you didn't do anything the night before.

The cardiologist's diet: if it tastes good, spit it out.

Doctor to patient: I have good news and bad news: the good news is that you are not a hypochondriac.

It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything.

HASH MISH-MANAGEMENT
Supreme Beings
Bob Latimer (6963815) & Kevin Murray (7210576)
Trailmaster: Lord Russell
Cellarmaster: Julie & John
Hash Horn: Yves "BoogieWoogie" Robert
Religious Adv/Sex Councillor: Leslie Nimno
Barbecue Bearer: David ‘Shortie’ Colbert
Ice Maiden: Dagmar Neubacher
Ha$h Ca$h: David ‘Shortie’ Colbert
Drinks for Wimps and Kids: Julie & John
Web Meister: Alan Oliphant
Website: http://www.mhash.com
Edit-Hare: Wendy Austin (6257399)
auswin@bow.intnet.mu